june 20

Jordan continues to experience minor increases in his most recent symptoms (vision, hearing, left side sensation) as time passes. He’ll have a few days of stability per-symptom, but they are each slowly increasing in severity. He’s also started to develop a tremble in the right hand.

He’s still heading to the Challenge Center Tuesdays and Fridays – and his time there is some of his favorite as he gets to push his body to whatever the limit is that day.

He will be working with a counselor from hospice this week to make a decision regarding his final day. He’s been feeling very conflicted about identifying the right time to transition, as some parts of his brain are still healing from radiation even as other parts of it are worsening from the tumor. We don’t have any way of knowing if the tumor will suddenly progress more rapidly the further we get from his last chemo, which adds a nice wildcard. He may require an increased level care very soon due to the right side tremble and the increased left weakness, so he has indicated his date will likely be before the end of the month.

I’ve been reading a lot of books on grief and death lately (for some reason), and I’ve compiled a brief synopsis of that reading on the public part of my blog. I added links to the books on Amazon for convenience, but I read most of them through our public library’s digital collection. Please take a look and take care of yourselves as we head into the end.

Hospice also covers grief counseling for friends and family – including out of town family. I’ve been in pre-bereavement counseling for about two months, and I’ve found it helpful to have another resource. If this is something you would like to explore, please let me know and I can connect you with our social worker to set something up. Jordan has a big chosen family, and if you need the support of an experienced counselor I want to help you get it. Don’t be shy about asking for a spot, I’m always open to discovering the upper limits of my insurance policies.

Jordan has been using the text-to-speech feature on his hearing aids to listen to text messages, so please feel free to send him your love! I’m not sure if he will want me to share his selected date in advance, but I will continue to share condition updates here each week regardless.

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